It was so hot last weekend that I felt like I only had two choices: stay inside in the air conditioning or take my butt to the beach. I chose the latter and was glad I did, but it made me take stock of my beach towel collection again. I spent a lot of time and energy cultivating a solid bath towel situation. (I have these because they dry quickly.) But since I only go to the beach a few times a year, I could care less about what I bring to dry. It makes sense, but the more I thought about it, the more I felt this was probably a mistake on my part.
Beach towels are great; they take up a good chunk of space in my apartment. I drag them all the way on the A train every time I go to the Rockaways. And they can say a lot about a person.
Why not just get one that I really like? Then I don’t have to think about it anymore and I’ll feel awesome every time I make a dramatic appearance when it arrives. When I mentioned this to my colleagues, they got excited. “I saw someone in a coral Chanel beach towel this weekend and it made me rethink my whole life,” one person joked. While Chanel might be a little out of my range, below are some options that I think would make a splash.
I have been told that Hotel Il Pellicano in Porto Ercole is one of the most beautiful there is. It has beautiful views and is tastefully decorated, and it’s too expensive for me to even consider going. So, of course, I’m dying to go. But you can pretend you’re there (and not at Jacob Riis) by buying a beach towel with yellow stripes similar to the ones they provide to guests. And if you have it monogrammed, it’s like being a VIP guest at your hotel.
The real thing will cost you a bit more, but they are out there. Apparently, this mustard shade was introduced for the opening of Mezzatorre, the sister hotel of Hotel Pellicano in Ischia last year, so you can tell if anyone asks.
If you really want a deep cut, I found this pre-owned beach towel purportedly from Harry’s Bar in Venice on eBay. I don’t know if this is actually true, but the odds of you running into someone on the beach who can definitively tell you otherwise are slim. And the towel is cold, so if you can afford it, who cares? (Although, you should probably try to negotiate a lower price…)
We buy vintage clothes, so why not vintage towels too? As long as they’re not stained… I’ve always wanted one from Missoni Home, but I actually think its past prints are cooler.
The same applies to the coup. I might even love this more than a vintage Pucci beach cover-up.
This is self-explanatory. It literally screams “status towel”.
This can help to attract a surfer’s attention.
This towel will certainly get you noticed on the beach, but it will also telegraph that you probably don’t take yourself too seriously. (Which we both know isn’t true.)
A classic. I love this beach towel. It’s big and soft and will never go out of style.
Bottega Veneta green is basically a logo, and you can get a hint of it in this towel, which is now on sale at SSENSE.
A perfect Coney Island towel. And if you pour ketchup and mustard on it? Even better!
I regret not buying this towel when it came out, but luckily you can get it for a relatively low price still at Grailed. This is exactly the face I’m going to make when I’m laying on the beach and someone comes up to me and says, “Oh my God, I love your towel!”
I thought I’d finally break free from the “Sandi style” grip it had on me, but this Copenhagen-based towel and bedding brand has convinced me there’s nothing better.
This towel also comes in a color called “tofu” which is just as nice, but I’m more of a beach goth, personally.
La Sirenuse in Positano is another Instagram-friendly Italian hotel with great merchandise.
Jemima Kirke’s character in the Chat with Friends wear this jumpsuit when you go swimming. I also have it in black and throw it on whenever I’m near a body of water.
If you like to exercise before jumping in the water, or want to look like you’re into that kind of thing, this jumpsuit looks close to tennis. (I have never played tennis.)
You’d never guess it unless you really zoomed in, but this skirt is made from repurposed kitchen towels and is on sale for a great price. (Same for the matching top and jacket.)
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